what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
