I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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