My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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