what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize