remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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