Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize