sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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