you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
