If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize