Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
it's not cheating when I paid for it
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
