Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I deserve to be covered in dicks
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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