found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize