I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
