Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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