she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
