"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize