just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
