I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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