Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.