yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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