I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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