and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize