How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize