You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
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