I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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