whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
