He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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