I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize