how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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