Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize