I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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