If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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