It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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