I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
