Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
