Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
where does the pee come out of this thing
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk walkin through police station. America
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize