How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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