well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Randomize