this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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