I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
