Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize