I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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