And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
