My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
