love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
