im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I don't think brook has ever known best
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I need to align my fucking chakras
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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