Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
