i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
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