Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Randomize
