did you get engaged???
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
